Bill Beare - Doesn't Know Why Lyrics

I wish I had a double, one you wouldn't recognize
I could be a total stranger in the right place at the right time
I could befriend you for a second, a casual remark
That would spur your attention, a blink, a spark
I would be there on occasions, not lurking but not on show
Someone seemingly of interest, someone you think you know
And as the time passed and those occasions grew
Acknowledgements became more frequent and anticipation too
Conversations now start; your life into the frame
Your work, your beautiful children, fears and dreams the closer we came
And at home you're all light headed; the start of a double life
And the real me senses your cheerfulness, yet doesn't know why

On the train every morning the stories and the smiles
Like a schoolgirl and a schoolboy in spring, and all the while
Life carries on as normal, the world outside our shell
No stress, no pain, no trauma, we're getting on so well
And now we're having coffees before we catch the train
Laughs and sighs and widening eyes; it's happening again
And then there's that brief moment where romance takes command
The movement in the moment where I reach and hold your hand
We've crossed the bridge of contact, that point of no return
The spark has caught the tinder; the heart has started to burn
At home the light and breezy moments are running dry
The real me senses you're uneasy but doesn't know why

The days are pushing harder, the intertwining of our souls
The joy of being together, spinning far from control
We hold each other tenderly; we fawn we stroke, we kiss
We talk of how life has endlessly brought us both to this
For me it's so delirious, from since I don't know when
I'm there, wonderful, mysterious; I have you back again
The touch, the taste, the warmth of love, the chance, the do and dare
The life that was forgotten is now one that we both share
But at home you're torn asunder; the feeling you're insane
The pleasure and the passion, the pressure and the pain
What was all so simple is now so all awry
The real me senses something but doesn't know why

Months have passed, the dice was cast, the tensions slowly built
The innocence has now long since turned into thoughts of guilt
There was never anything there wanting for a thrilling so haunting
To have so many tears born from such a kiss
How things unfold when love takes hold, how a double life takes its toll
And brings us, brings us both to this
Here in my room full of your perfume I pour the poison wine
Forgive me as I take the step that takes you from me a second time
Do I regret it? No! It was a most wonderful thing
I held you and I love you and its magic made me sing
To be that part of you again could never be a moral crime
To feel your love, to make you laugh, to have you almost mine
And life still carries on; your work, family and friends
Though something beautiful, come and gone. You needed that love again
At home the mundane takes its place, the longing no longer exists
We came and went without a trace, back into the mist
Sometimes at night the memories might take hold and bring a tear
Of you and I in another time in another sphere
The sound of softly crying is heard but only just
The real me doesn't know why and I hope he never does