Crazy Tape - Fuck I Hate To Have A Haemorrhoid Lyrics

Sitting by my window
I can feel it growing bigger
And it scares the hell out if me
Though I know I cannot stop it
I can't seem to find a way
To find relief
I'm the one it's picking on
And I don't like it anymore
I don't wanna play this game

Fuck I hate to have a haemorrhoid

Rubbing creams
And squirting sprays
Is all a part of life to me
And I don't find it amusing
After all
I know it is down there somewhere
Lurking around and causing grief
But I can't reach it

Fuck I hate to have a haemorrhoid
Fuck I hate to have a haemorrhoid

Fuck I hate to have a haemorrhoid
Fuck I hate to have a
Fuck I hate to have a haemorrhoid
Fuck I hate to have a

Pain has overwhelmed me
I'm a tired pathetic mess
Have to get it seen to
Have to do what's best
Please take off your strides
Lay down over there
Relax my poor old friend
Put your feet up in the air

Fuck I hate to have a haemorrhoid
Fuck I hate to have a
Fuck I hate to have a haemorrhoid
Fuck I hate to have a
Fuck I hate to have a haemorrhoid
Fuck I hate to have a
Fuck I hate to have a haemorrhoid
Fuck I hate to

From the guts of the beast
Doom's fire doth speweth
In the towns and villages
Poor folk he doth cheweth

And he smiles as he probes around
Deriving pleasure from my pain
And he laughs as he squeezes
Driving me more and more insane
Sharper
Harder
Sharper
Harder
Piercing my ane
My ane
My ane
Oh fuck