John T. Wurzer - Hair Loss Tragedy Lyrics

He lost all his hair at a very young age
It was in all the papers I'm told
Such a shame for a man with a lifetime of plans
To go bald at twenty-seven years old
His girl broke it off, "It's not you dear; it's me."
With a text from her over-sized phone
Such a shame; such a scare; to lose all his hair
And be left so completely alone

Meanwhile his hair went on a wild drunken binge
At its first taste of sweet liberty
Partied raucously wild; like a motherless child
Finally knowing how it feels to be free
With senses all curled in a permanent wave
Washed by the snow moon in December
With a flush and a start that tore it a part
Snip, snip, snip and it all was dismembered

There's is more to this tail, a pony, a braid
A cornrow, dreadlocks, and a warning
Such a shock to his locks; when they found only socks
And no lover to touch in the morning
Waking up so alone with no wallet, no phone
Lying limp in a pillow-less bed
There is much more to say, but what I'll convey
Is that they say that his hair lost its head